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Wow, it has been a long long time I'm not updating my dreamwidth account.
Today while I'm watching Glee, I just realized I miss my real life so much. I miss my friends, I miss my uni life, even I miss being scolded by my lecturers. But why did it happen so suddenly? Well, here's the story.
Last night, I was wandering around on the usual local forum, with my clone account (that's what we call there if you have 2 or more different accounts). Then when I showed my self to one of lounge there, it turned out I didn't get a warm welcome. Instead, I got humiliated by them. One of the user there said me stupid implicitly because I asked something regarding subbing matters. This week, I really want to do subbing and when I wanted to download the program, I saw many of links there. I'm a paranoid person, I admit that. I'm afraid if I download the wrong program, my notebook will become broken. So I asked which file I have to download to two users on that forum. One user is nice, well he has known me for ages now and he really is a nice person. And the other user, I just made him at the exclusive lounge there, and he's subber too, so I also asked him. But this other user, he seemed like thinking I'm so stupid even I didn't know which file I have to download. It's just the beginning.
Back to last night accident,
one of the user there told me "You can't read English? You don't understand English? You can read manual!" Woo so rude! And those other user too told him in implicit way that I'm so tupid even I don't know which file I had to download. Okay, that's it. I signed out from that forum right away, I was so pissed off even until now.
Then when I watched Glee, I suddenly want my to get back to my real life. And why is that? I have realized that cyber world is not real. I can get mad to those people I met on the internet, but I don't know him/her. And now I even realized that this is not real! Also, I'm too captivated in the idol worlds til I hate someone I haven't ever met. It sounds ridiculous.

I hope I can pull out all my braveness to get back to my uni life next month and hopefully the uni still give me a second chance. I don't wanna spend my whole life getting angry, get disappointed by people whom the face I even don't know. I really have to get back to my real life soon or else I'm getting more and more insane.
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I just finished watching the latest Khuntoria episode subbed by that amazing subber team (kamsahamnida ~~~) and I couldn't help myself LOL-ing when EunHyuk oppa did the Elevator dance with Khunnie :D
I even made gif images for these epic moments :

First, it was when EunHyuk and Khunnie demonstrating Elevator dance to Victoria

See how they two were so excited EunHyuk was so excited, well EunHyuk is well-know for his dancing ability after all.

And the second one was daebak! EunHyuk pretended slapping Khunnie ROFL. I have to admit I repeated this scene many times. EunHyuk became "S" LOL

Ah, this episode is so amazing! Because of EunHyuk oppa ~

Random : maybe from now on, I might be actively post here. I really get frustating and being irritated about my fandom lately (-_-) I'll still check my LJ account everyday juts to see my FP and also I'll make sure that I still post in Shota's comm. Hope I can last till the end of the month for not commenting to anyone's journals and posting anything to my own journals.

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I'm getting sick!!! Yeah right *sobs* Looks like I'll be getting an influeza :( For me, it's okay if I get influenza right away without the pre-symptom but it seldom happen (-_-) And now I have to experience the symptom I really hate, an uncomfortable feeling at my throat (-_-) I really really hate this one symptom.
And now, after 1 day, I also have to deal with the mucous come out from my nose ... well still in liquid form but still I have to use many tissues to wipe it away. if the Greenpeace see me like this now, using many tissues rather than using one towel which can be easily washed, I'm sure they'll bring this issue LOL Even though I already know how much trees have been cut to make tissue but frankly speaking ... who wants to use the towel to wipe the liquid? It's wasting too much energy ... beside my body is still weak. I haven't gone anywhere from my dorm since I'm sick :( I really want to eat takoyaki and also matcha milkshake!!!!

~ Hope I will get well soon ~
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I rarely sad or even worse cry because of hearing the sad song, watching sad/touched movies, etc but I don't know why my heart always have torn apart if I listen to this two song.
First one is Jessee Mccartney "Because You Live"

Here's the lyrics. I wrote this based on my hearing and English is not my native language, so feel free to critisize/correct me if you point out a mistake.

Somewhow this lyrics reminds me of my heartbreaking, hurtful, but also blessed one-sided love. Why? Because when I felt in love with that person on my high school period, suddenly I become diligent in studying and praying. I though he felt the same with me, but then I knew that he's already somebody to love. I've made a poem *if you consider this as a poem* to scream my feeling at that time

And also this song, I love listening this so much. It's Shayne Ward "Breathless".
I love his voice though, but it hasn't touching lyrics like Jessee has. Still, I love this two songs. Only this two songs which could make me touched and crying. Although now I don't cry anymore by listening these two songs, but still I feel a wound in my heart which has healed re-open again ... Yes, right. My first love was so hurtful, painful which makes me trauma til now.

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Yeah, right! I get caught up by Glee right now just because of hearing this song from its OST

Yup, it's Alone sang by Will and April, two characters from Glee. And I just knew that this song are the cover song from Celine Dion's, my most fave diva. She has a very powerful voice, the same like Charice Pempengco (she appeared in Glee season 2) and also Mercedes (one of main characters in Glee).

A few days ago I started downloading whole episode of Glee season 1 *chuckles* So far I've already watched until episode 2, still 20 episodes more to go though to finish season 1, while now Glee season 2 has already reached 16th episodes o_O I really have to catch up soon LOL otherwise I can't keep up the pace like anyone else, sometimes it's annoying if you accidentally read the spoiler right? Besides, my fave American TV Series Gossip Girl is now on hiatus so I have many times to finish watching Glee. I also have no appetite to watch Japanese variety shows or watch any Japan-related shows even JE-related right now, soooo it's the perfect time :P

And also I somewhow get fired up to fix Glee subtitle. So far I've already fixed 2nd and 15th episode subtitle (cheers for me. Yay!). That's me if I'm addicted to something. I don't hesitate to do anything related to what I'm addicted right now.


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There were 3 things which made me shocked :
1. Tatsuya Ueda (aka Uepi aka Tat-chan from KAT-TUN), my ichiban in JE, wrote in his latest manual that he wouldn't update his manual again until next year because of the pain he felt in his hand. the doctor told him not to. When I read that "Nooooo! It can't be real, right?" He always wrote short manual and then now he said he won't update again until next year :( And also KAT-TUN hasn't had a new variety show since CTKT, although I still can see them on CMs, music shows, but still it's not satisfying my hunger. I want to know Uepi's daily news through his manual since he's rarely appeared in dramas and rarely talk in the shows which KAT-TUN invited *thank God now he's pushed by KoKame to talk, thank you KoKame* Sometimes I felt jelous with Koki's, Kame's, Maru's fans just because the three of them wrote a long manual (^_^") comparing to my ichiban *sobs*

The tsunami which happened in Japan a couple days ago.
2. I've got the news that Uepi is okay and only his house which partly damaged. And when I read the latest news about saying that he collapsed due shock, I became worried again ;_;

3. I felt really worried about Tsuyoshi "Kinki Kids" when I didn't found his name in the safe people's list *I'm Kinki Kids's fan, okay? I respect them* I checked the list again and again, hoping his name will be popped out there.
Now when I know all JE boys are safe ,although some of them lost their home and some have minor injuries (I really feel sad for HSJ fans since almost half of HSJ members had injuries), I can feel relieved. But still I worry all of them, all people in Japan, because the disaster hasn't calmed down.

*Keep praying here for all people's safety there in Japan*


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